Conformity makes you happy?

I work for a well-known company in India. My job involves meeting a lot of people, everyday. People from various backgrounds and at various levels in the organization. If one were to step back from the sheer tediousness of listening and talking to so many people, its actually a very fascinating experience. Not an experience that I would recommend anyone embrace, but one that I'm sure people would appreciate.

I see a lot of people who have no idea, why is it that they do what they do. People are sticklers for conformity. Thats what they have done all their life. That was what families, peers and societies have demanded out of them. They have got a degree in a subject, which they had no idea they were interested in, but the family circle, thought being an Engineer or a Doctor was respectable. Being an MBA was respectable. They are in marriages which were forced upon them, as they hit the marriageable age. An age deemed by society. Men and women, who are kids themselves, are changing diapers. People in love, decide to tie the knot, coz society demands that they need that stamp of conformity to lead a normal conjugal life.

All these things come at a cost. Your education, love, marriage, loveless marriage. Everything. And the cost is not always money. When such things of greater importance have been an exercise in conformity, what are the odds that your job is going to be any different? You get into what, at the time, was the most talked about industry and meet people like me. I would tell you that, after a point this job like most corporate jobs, would become a pursuit of the next pay cheque to pay your bills. Fulfillment of the soul is moot, as there is no soul to fill. You might think that Conformity, never killed anybody but creativity did. Well my friend, each day you conform, you die a little. Its a pity we hardly do anything about it, though we realize we are dying.

Go on. Be a Tiger (the jungli billi). Challenge the paradigm. Tiger Woods screwed it up, coz he tried to conform to what society expected of him. Nobody lifts an eyebrow at a George Clooney, Vijay Mallya or a Lewis Hamilton. They live on their own terms and make money too.

I recently watched this movie, "Up In The Air" and I must say no movie in recent times has left such an impression on me. I live a nomadic life and revel in the anonymity it gives me, even from my family. We all need someone / something to cling to. But is conformity the price that we pay for it? Are we willing to bear the weight of this conformity?

I have no answer to this question. In life, we need to decide for ourselves, what are the Principles of Life we need to adhere to and live them, regardless of short term consequences.

Watch the movie: "Up In the Air"



An excerpt from the dialogues:

George Clooney: How much did they first pay you to give up on your dreams?

The Guy He is Firing: 27 Grand a Year

GC: And when were you going to stop and come back and do what makes you happy?

TGHIF: Good question

Observations from a road trip

1. Do you have a car, money to buy fuel but sit at home on a pleasant Sunday noon, thinking how bored you are? Its time you get car-jacked. The thief would make better use of your car.

2. Traffic on the road and at the wine shop is much thinner on Sunday.

3. I've always known that Punjabis are loud, but drunk Punjabis are louder than a Pioneer music system, belting out Psychedelic rock.

4. A drunk Punjabi forgets directions within 10 mts but can still buy awesome cake. Road trips are infinitely more fun when drunk Punjabi is around (No offence to Punjabis, your women are hot!)

5. No Punjabi, drunk or sober, would accept non-kadak roti at a Dhabha. It insults everything they hold dear in life. (It should insult all Indians, if u ask me)

6. The Indian countryside is infinitely beautiful. You do not have to visit these extortion rackets called "country resorts" to enjoy the beauty of nature.

7. If you are going to start a bonfire from the stump of a tree by the lake bed, on a starry half-moon night you better have along more liquor and meat or at the least some newspapers so u don't have to sit on wet mud.

8. The setting mentioned in #7 can be considered romantic, only if you are in company of a partner of the opposite sex

9. No one takes kindly to being pissed on, especially dying embers of a bonfire you are trying to put out. Watch out for the fire flakes!

10. You can always coax a dhaba guy to make a 5 egg anda burjee, even when his menu mentions only 1 egg anda burjee

11. After several rounds of KingFisher Light, it just takes one Knock Out, to knock you out!!

12. Stay Cool. Even as you skid on a dirt road you have hit by mistake and dust flies all around, waking the passed out men in the back seat. Your calmness will put them back to sleep in no time. There is no greater sin than disturbing the slumber of a drunk man.

13. Before you embark on a road trip - Fill your tank and empty your bladder, repeatedly!

14. Im happy I could keep my vow of abstinence, through this trip!

Would You Make Your New Year Resolution Public?

I know a lot of people scoff at new year resolutions. Primarily, because we end up not keeping them. There are many more who would look down on the idea, as that is giving one day too much significance. Hence some Bankers, moved New Years to 1 April, Fools Day! If you break your resolution, you can tell you conscience, "I was fooling you anyway!!" or would that be vice versa? Only a banker could have done that!! (Play with promises and conscience, and make a chicken and egg story of the two!!)

But I do believe we should be able to make promises to ourselves to keep. Pick a day and do it. Since most of us don't do it anyways, Jan 1 is just as good a day to start. The point being, DO IT. Let us avoid cowardice, and hide behind phrases like "Subconsciously, I knew..." "My Head said..." "My Heart said..." etc

Its a tough battle between the two. Let not the dread of breaking a promise for 300 days of the year, stop us from making a promise for the first 65. Its ok, it gets better. We should not give up on ourselves so easily. Its a struggle worth fighting for - Nirvana, it is, when there is absolute unity between the conscious and subconscious.

I make my promises; some public, most private.


1. I would abstain from alcohol, through the year.
2. I would lose, a kg a week till i get back to my MBA days weight level!
3. The rest are private :)

Oh yes, wish you a very happy new year my dears!!