Observations from a road trip

1. Do you have a car, money to buy fuel but sit at home on a pleasant Sunday noon, thinking how bored you are? Its time you get car-jacked. The thief would make better use of your car.

2. Traffic on the road and at the wine shop is much thinner on Sunday.

3. I've always known that Punjabis are loud, but drunk Punjabis are louder than a Pioneer music system, belting out Psychedelic rock.

4. A drunk Punjabi forgets directions within 10 mts but can still buy awesome cake. Road trips are infinitely more fun when drunk Punjabi is around (No offence to Punjabis, your women are hot!)

5. No Punjabi, drunk or sober, would accept non-kadak roti at a Dhabha. It insults everything they hold dear in life. (It should insult all Indians, if u ask me)

6. The Indian countryside is infinitely beautiful. You do not have to visit these extortion rackets called "country resorts" to enjoy the beauty of nature.

7. If you are going to start a bonfire from the stump of a tree by the lake bed, on a starry half-moon night you better have along more liquor and meat or at the least some newspapers so u don't have to sit on wet mud.

8. The setting mentioned in #7 can be considered romantic, only if you are in company of a partner of the opposite sex

9. No one takes kindly to being pissed on, especially dying embers of a bonfire you are trying to put out. Watch out for the fire flakes!

10. You can always coax a dhaba guy to make a 5 egg anda burjee, even when his menu mentions only 1 egg anda burjee

11. After several rounds of KingFisher Light, it just takes one Knock Out, to knock you out!!

12. Stay Cool. Even as you skid on a dirt road you have hit by mistake and dust flies all around, waking the passed out men in the back seat. Your calmness will put them back to sleep in no time. There is no greater sin than disturbing the slumber of a drunk man.

13. Before you embark on a road trip - Fill your tank and empty your bladder, repeatedly!

14. Im happy I could keep my vow of abstinence, through this trip!

The Beer Chronicles

This is the story of 3 bachelors in their late 20's and their tryst with 8 rounds of beer during a road trip.

Round 1 - Nothing

Round 2 - Burp!

Round 3 -
Krazy Kumar - "You idiots bought only 3?"
Me - "Guilty"
Krazy Kumar - "The point about beer is when you're done drinking, there should always be another 2 bottles around"
Me - "Guilty as charged, My Lord!"

Resupply

Round 4 - Boys stop on a bridge and pose for photographs and also take photos with the beer bottle and of it. Said Beer bottle is treated like a deity..

Round 5 - Boys stop on the middle of the highway and pose for photos - again, this time while sitting on the middle of the road

Round 6 -

"Maa"

Boys reminiscence about their mother and how they understand them the best. There was also almost a, "Mere paas maa hai" dialogue, almost..

Round 7 - 2 Boys talk about this awesome woman in their office, and her charms and her voice and her eyes and declare that if only she were not married with kids, she would have definitely been proposed to. Me say "Hmmmmmmmmmm...."

Round 8 - Boys congratulate each other on an awesome roadtrip!! :-))))